


Brody's Diary

by starryviolentine (LadySoymilk)



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Friendship, Minor Original Character(s), Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-01-11 17:53:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18429122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySoymilk/pseuds/starryviolentine
Summary: Eleven-year-old Violet and twelve-year-old Brody are not only roommates, they're best friends. They hang out together, eat meals together, and always try to sit together during class. Their third roommate, Therissa, rolls her eyes and calls them "attached at the hip." But when Brody's special diary goes missing and it seems like Violet is the culprit, their relationship is put to the test. Can the girls find a way to reconcile, or is their friendship over for good? A pre-apocalypse story.





	1. Chapter 1

     

          For as many times Violet has dozed off in science class, today is not one of those days. The science teacher makes an announcement at the beginning of the lesson that tomorrow they would be dissecting a cow’s eye. A real, actual cow _eyeball_. How cool is that? The eleven year old doesn’t even care that Louis is assigned to be her lab partner. For the rest of class, Mr. Stanley shows a slideshow about what to expect during the procedure, complete with detailed explanations of the tools they will use, the anatomy of an eyeball, and lots of grotesque pictures.

          There are a few calls of "eww”and “gross” and one kid in the back laughs and makes gagging noises, but Violet has never been more excited about something school related. When the bell -- not just the standard end-of-class bell, but the extra long chime sequence signifying the end of the whole school day -- rings, Violet hops up and quickly shoves her things into her backpack, slinging it over one shoulder. There is only one thought on her mind.

          She can’t wait to tell Brody.

          Violet makes it back to the dormitory and climbs up the stairs to the second floor lounge. Just as she’s about to make up her mind whether to wait there for her friend or just meet her in their room, the twin-tailed girl herself marches straight up to Violet as though she had been waiting for her arrival.

          “Not funny, Vi,” Brody starts, hands on her hips and lips turned into a frown. “Give it back.”

           Violet has no idea what Brody’s going on about, and the fact that the girl seems angry at her catches her off guard. “What?”

           “I know it was you!” Her friend’s voice steadily rises in both volume and pitch as her emotions start to take over.

           The confused blonde backtracks and tries to think of anything she could have done to make Brody mad, but she can’t think of anything. “What are you talking about?”

          “My diary, Vi!” Brody snaps. “Don’t play dumb!”

          “I didn’t take your diary.”

          The girl scoffs. “Do you think I’m stupid?”

          “Are you sure you didn’t, like, leave it somewhere?” Violet asks. Maybe by giving Brody ideas of where her diary might be, she can prevent this crime from being pinned onto her unfairly. “You take that thing everywhere.”

          “It was on my desk this morning and now it’s gone!” Brody yells, stepping closer to Violet and glaring at her. “The only people who can get inside our room are __you__  and Therissa, and I doubt it was her.”

          “But I-”

__“You’re__  the one who’s always telling me how dumb it is!”

           “Brody, listen!” Violet takes a step back, trying to put a little more distance between them now that her friend is getting uncomfortably close. She itches for some personal space. “I didn’t take it.”

          But Brody doesn’t listen. She doesn’t seem to be hearing anything that Violet’s saying. “Stop, Vi! Just give it back and I won’t get mad!”

__You’re already mad__ , Violet wants to point out, but she bites her tongue. “I don’t have-”

          “Don’t you dare lie to me!” the livid girl seethes, taking yet another step closer to Violet. “I know it was you!”

          Trying to keep her cool despite the growing frustration inside her, Violet clenches her jaw and takes a few deep breaths. Brody keeps cutting her off and she hates it. “You’re not listen-”

          “Do you have… _ _any__  idea how…” Brody shakes her head, letting out a strained growl. The girl is close to hysterical and is no longer making sense. “You… I can’t…!

          Violet knows how important Brody’s diary is to her. Sure, she’s poked fun at her a few times for writing in it every single day and bringing it with her everywhere she goes. But she would never __take__  it and she needs Brody to know that. She tries one last time to get her friend to listen. “Brody, I really didn’t-”          

          “GIVE. IT. BACK!” Brody bellows, and Violet flinches as the demand resonates through her like thunder. For a few seconds she just stands there, shocked. The silence that follows is so deafening that Violet can hear her own heart pounding in her head. Slowly, the words start to sink in and she, too, erupts in a fit of rage.

          “Back off!” Violet shouts. Before she even realizes what she’s doing, she reaches out and shoves Brody away forcefully. “I never touched your stupid diary!” As soon as it happens, she regrets it immediately. Brody stumbles backwards but quickly regains her footing. Guilt catching in her throat, Violet backs away a few steps and dares to take a peek up at the auburn-haired girl for her reaction.

          Brody has an incredulous look on her face, but it instantly changes back to anger and she points an accusatory finger directly at Violet. “You…! I don’t _ _ever__  want to talk to you again!” With that, Brody sticks her nose in the air and stomps away, leaving Violet stunned and, honestly, still really unsure of what just happened.

          Suddenly Violet is hyperaware of all the eyes that are staring at her due to having witnessed the whole ordeal. She needs to get out of there. Doing her best to ignore the whispers and the pointing, she flees from the lounge with her head down as to not make eye contact with anybody. Thankfully, her shared bedroom isn’t very far. Within a minute Violet bursts into the room, already kicking off her shoes. She climbs up to her top bunk and flops aggressively facedown onto her bed.

          There’s a strange, tight feeling in Violet’s chest that won’t go away. It started earlier while Brody was yelling at her, and it lingers as if making sure today’s events stay fresh in her mind. How annoying. Now all Violet can think about is how unbelievably __pissed__  her roommate is, all over something she didn’t even do, and how she very well might have lost her first and only friend at Ericson.

__“I don’t__ ever _ _want to talk to you again!”__

          Growling in frustration into her pillow, Violet curls up and resigns. She doesn’t want to see Brody right now, or even think about Brody, at least not until she gets an apology. Blaming people without any proof isn’t fair, and Violet broods over being wrongly accused by somebody who’s supposed to be her friend. Maybe Brody will come to her senses once she realizes the truth, but, until then, Violet decides that she just won’t care.


	2. Chapter 2

(Therissa is one of the Ericson kids mentioned by Willy in the game as one of the students who died sometime during apocalypse. I normally don’t write fanfics using characters who don’t have a canon appearance and personality already, but for this story I needed a third roommate/older sibling figure for Violet and Brody. Before I knew it, I had come up with this headcanon of Therissa…and I’ve kind of fallen in love with her character! She was kind of inspired by Xanthippe from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.)

* * *

          Violet must have dozed off because the next thing she knows is she’s being shaken awake. The bedroom is a little darker than she remembers. How long was she asleep? 

          “Rise and shine, loser. You’re gonna miss dinner.”

          The voice belongs to Violet and Brody’s seventeen year old roommate, Therissa. Therissa is sarcastic, indifferent, and possesses a rather dark sense of humor. In these few months of living together, Violet has grown accustomed to the teenager’s tendency to be a little mean. She’s not sure why, exactly, Therissa was sent to Ericson, but she has a feeling that it has something to do with her attitude.

          Normally Violet doesn’t care about the names Therissa calls her and Brody, but tonight it strikes her in a sore spot. She rolls over until she’s facing the wall and closes her eyes again, hoping that Therissa will leave her alone. She’s really in no mood to talk to anybody. 

          “Hey, you haven’t caught that stomach thing that’s been going around, have you?” Therissa notices her younger roomie’s lack of response and wonders if there’s something wrong. “Justin told me that two kids were puking their guts out in the boys’ dorm this morning. Totally disgusting.”

          The younger girl still hasn’t said a word or even acknowledged her presence, so Therissa comes a little closer to Violet’s bunk to check in on her. As the oldest, she feels a smidge of responsibility to make sure her younger roommates are, even if not entirely okay, still breathing at the very least. “If you’re gonna hurl, don’t do it in here.”

          “I’m not sick.”

          “Oh, good. You’re not dead,” Therissa says flatly. “Get up. Go eat.”

          Violet scowls at the wall. “I’m not hungry.”

          So there  _is_  something wrong. Therissa had a feeling something was off, but now she’s pretty certain that her youngest roommate is upset. “What’s eating you?”

          Tired of all the poking and prodding, Violet’s temper goes off. “I’m just not hungry, okay? Leave me alone!”

          “Seriously?” The teenager rolls her eyes and heaves an exasperated sigh. “Okay, if  _that’s_  how you’re gonna be.”

          For a brief moment Violet thinks that she’s won and that Therissa’s going to leave her alone. To her horror, she couldn’t have been more wrong. Therissa slips out of her boots and hoists herself up into the little blonde’s bunk.

          “Move over.”

          There’s a short pause while Violet considers her next move. It’s still not too late to fight Therissa on this. But Violet’s tired, and she’s got no spark left in her to keep up her tough front. She sluggishly scoots closer to the wall to make room for the older girl.

          Therissa makes herself comfortable in the space next to Violet. “So, what’s up with you?”

          Violet doesn’t answer.

          “Come on, Violet,” the teen tries again. There’s no way for Therissa to see the kind of expression Violet’s making with her facing the other way, so she has to make do with speaking to the back of the younger girl’s head. “This amount of sulking isn’t normal, even for you. I know something’s wrong.”

          Violet’s ears perk up. She can’t tell if she’s imagining it, but her roommate’s voice suddenly sounds a little gentler than usual. It’s really strange.

          “You wanna tell me about it?”

          This is the first time Therissa has shown any concern for Violet’s feelings. The younger girl isn’t sure how to respond. Deep, deep down there’s a part of her that longs to open up to Therissa. There’s a voice inside her head giving her the okay to turn to the teen for comfort and reassurance, but it’s currently being drowned out by an overbearing warning alarm sounding  _No! No! No!_ In her current emotional state, Violet knows that if she does try to talk about what happened, she will probably start crying like a baby and won’t be able to stop. And that would be a complete nightmare.

          “No? Okay.” Therissa stretches out so that she’s lying comfortably on her back with her arms behind her head. “You won’t mind if I just stay here for the rest of the night, then?”

          “Don’t,” Violet mumbles quietly. “Just go.”

          “How could I possibly have an appetite when my favorite little blonde brat is all sad and lonely and won’t even tell me what’s wrong?” Therissa’s teasing is familiar and oddly comforting. Her persistence cracks away at Violet’s protective shell and the younger girl can feel her guard slipping. “Let me guess. You got detention for sleeping during class again?”

          As a matter of fact, Violet hasn’t fallen asleep in class for a good couple of weeks. She shakes her head.

          “Boy trouble?”

          Violet scrunches up her nose and makes a face even though Therissa can’t see it. “No, gross!”

          The teenager laughs. “What else…?” After a pause, she suddenly gasps and feigns horror. “Don’t tell me – the dining hall stopped serving chicken nuggets?”

          A tiny smile tugs on the corners of Violet’s mouth. “Stop.”

          “I’ll leave you alone as soon as you tell me what’s wrong,” Therissa says, adjusting her position again so that she’s back to sitting upright. Her tone also changes to reflect her posture, becoming lower and more serious.

          At this point, Violet knows that the teen isn’t going to give up. She pulls the covers over her head and groans. “Fine,” she mutters, voice muffled by her blanket, “I’ll tell you.”

          “Sorry, I can’t really hear you with that blanket over your face,” Therissa exaggerates. “Maybe if you turned around so we could have a conversation like actual human beings-”

          “Okay, okay! God!” Violet surrenders. She wiggles under the covers until her head pokes out, then pushes herself into a sitting position and finally faces her roommate. “Happy?”

          Even though Violet’s looking in Therissa’s direction, she won’t look her in the eyes. Still, it’s a start. “Whenever you’re ready.”

          It takes Violet a while before she musters enough courage to talk. Therissa is patient and allows the girl to take as much time as she needs. She can tell that whatever happened is really bugging her. Rather than risk the possibility of making Violet change her mind and close up again by saying anything else, she waits until she’s ready to talk.

          Violet, who hates talking about her feelings and avoids it whenever possible, can’t believe what she’s gotten herself into. Nevertheless, she prepares a single sentence. It’s short, sweet and to the point. Closing her eyes, she rehearses it in her head several times, in a nonchalant voice, until she’s confident that that’s exactly how it’s going to sound coming out of her mouth. Once satisfied, she gives herself a last minute mental pep talk. That no matter what, she’s not going to start crying and make herself look stupid. 

_I will not cry in front of Therissa. I will not cry in front of Therissa. I will not cry in front of Therissa._ Violet inhales deeply and opens her eyes. It’s now or never.

          “Brody-” The eleven year old doesn’t even get one word out before her voice betrays her and falters. The moment the name comes out of her mouth, her friend’s angry face comes into her mind and she feels it again. That same heavy, sinking feeling in her stomach and the tightening in her chest from earlier that day. Her eyes sting with tears and her throat feels like it’s constricting. Violet makes a fatal mistake. She glances up and catches Therissa’s unusually soft and understanding gaze.

          It’s all over. The dam has broken and Violet’s no longer in control of her own body. Her shoulders tremble and shudder and she chokes out her words. “B-Brody’s mad at me…”

          The teenager is taken aback at how instantly her roommate breaks into tears. The longer she thinks about it, though, the more she realizes that it’s not so surprising after all. When Violet first arrived at Ericson, she refused to say a word to anybody for nearly two weeks. Brody was the first person to get her to talk. Not once was Brody put off by Violet’s anti-social front, and she continued to have one-sided conversations with her every day until, finally, her determination paid off and Violet started responding.

          From then on, the two of them only grew closer and closer. Violet warmed up to Brody rather quickly, and Therissa was secretly glad that Brody now had someone her own age to pester while in their dorm room. Occasionally, after lights-out, Brody would climb into Violet’s bunk with her portable DVD player and they would be up late watching one of the auburn-haired girl’s cheesy tween movies, stifling giggles as they huddled underneath the covers.

          Of course, Therissa would get mad and yell at them to  _“Shut up and go to sleep!”_

          They go to breakfast, lunch and dinner together. Therissa suspects that they spend every waking hour outside of class together, too. Skinny little Violet with her toothpick legs even joined the Ericson Outdoor Adventure Club because Brody wanted her to come with her on their nature hikes and camping trips. Up until now Therissa has never seen one half of the duo in their bedroom without the other somewhere nearby.

          And as much as Violet likes to act tough and hide her emotions, Therissa knows that she cares about Brody a lot and that she’s completely soft when it comes to her friend. Watching Violet crumble simply because she and Brody had a silly little fight earlier is enough indication that tonight is going to suck, especially if their dorm room turns into a warzone. The teenager would much rather be as uninvolved with this tween drama as possible, but right now her roommate looks like she could really use somebody there with her. Contrary to popular belief, Therissa isn’t  _completely heartless,_ so she stays and waits for Violet to tell her the whole story.


	3. Chapter 3

           

          With two years of experience at this boarding school for “troubled youth” under her belt, it comes as no surprise that Therissa has witnessed a lot of crappy situations. But nothing she has seen in all that time even comes close to this. Her youngest roommate, Violet, is an absolute mess. 

           “In the lounge…after class…she just started yelling at me…for no reason…!”

           Therissa has never seen anything more pitiful in her life.   

           Speech riddled with shaky, whimpery breaths, Violet struggles to tell Therissa what happened between her and Brody. It might have been a lot easier on both girls if she had waited until she was calmer before starting to talk, but after bottling up her hurt and frustration all afternoon, Violet can no longer hold back. The words keep tumbling from her lips. 

           “Sh-she said…that I took her diary…but I didn’t…! I’ve never even touched it… I wouldn’t! And I tried… I tried to tell her but she didn’t listen… She kept saying…I took it… She wouldn’t listen! But I didn’t…! I didn’t take it!”

           Violet lets her head drop into her hands as one last sob forces its way out of her throat. The main part of her story is finished. She can only hope that it was intelligible enough for Therissa to understand. Violet hastily wipes at her eyes with her sleeves, pointlessly, because her tears haven’t quite stopped.

           She didn’t want to cry.

           So much for that. Violet’s upset with herself for being so weak, not to mention downright embarrassed that she let her roommate see her like this. There’s no way she’s making eye contact with Therissa again.

           But her roommate is patient. She doesn’t say anything or make a fuss over her tears, which is exactly what Violet needs. Before long, Violet starts to feel a little better. Her shoulders feel lighter, almost like when she finally takes off her backpack on those unlucky days when she gets homework from every single teacher and has to take all of her books home. Finally,  _finally_ , Violet’s tears subside and the girl drags her palms down her cheeks to rid them of the offending wet streaks trailing down to her chin.  

           “And then-” 

           Voice thick and nasally, Violet attempts to continue but stops abruptly. Her congested nose has started to run and she pauses to sniffle hard. She doesn’t have anything to blow her nose with. Out of options, Violet decides to use one of her sleeves, not wanting to gross Therissa out with what seems like endless snot now dripping out of her nose. Unfortunately, one swipe of her sleeve isn’t enough to do the trick. In fact, it actually ends up making things worse by sort of smearing everything around. Violet panics and, mortified, slaps her hands over her face to cover the mess, shooting Therissa an S.O.S. with her eyes.

           Much to Violet’s relief, Therissa gets the message and climbs down to steal Brody’s box of tissues from her desk and brings it up to her. She takes a much needed moment to clean herself up. When she’s finished, Violet sighs softly, feeling a hell of a lot better. The embarrassment is still there, though. Violet thanks the heavens that at least Brody didn’t come walking in while she was  _crying_.

           The eleven year old gathers all of her used tissues and bunches them up in a fist. She keeps her eyes down as she resumes talking. “She said that she never wants to talk to me again…”

           Therissa shakes her head and finally says something. “You two are, like, BFFs. There’s no freaking way.”

           Violet absentmindedly fingers the edge of her blanket. She doesn’t look convinced.

           Sighing, Therissa raises an arm and smooths out Violet’s hair, which got pretty ruffled and messy while she was burrowing into her blankets earlier. “Don’t let that get you down, okay?”

           Violet nods slightly, still unable to believe how nice her roommate is being. It almost makes her wonder if she’s dreaming. She will never admit it out loud, but the way Therissa is fixing her hair and patting her on the head actually feels really nice. It makes Violet feel warm inside. “I’ve never seen her like that before. I mean, like, I’ve seen her mad, like that time Marlon put a caterpillar in her hair, but not like this.”

           “Well, can you blame her?” Therissa asks. “Think about it. Diaries are always full of personal crap that nobody else is supposed to see. If something like that suddenly goes missing, maybe even stolen on purpose, of course she’d react like that. She’s probably freaked out that it’s gonna end up in the wrong hands.”

           “I hope Trey and Mitch don’t find it,” Violet says, frowning. “They would tease her for the next century. They’re still being jerks to Maddie about the whole swimming pool incident.”

           “What I wanna know,” Therissa crosses her arms, “is why Brody thinks you took it. That part makes no sense.” The teen doesn’t notice Violet wilt slightly. “You know, considering you two are practically joined at the hip.”

           The younger girl swallows, stomach starting to hurt as she comes to the realization that this is partly her own fault. “Well…I kinda told her that diaries are dumb…”

           Therissa snorts and shakes her head, chuckling. “Oh, shit. I don’t mean to laugh, but…seriously, Violet? You can’t say that to  _Brody_  of all people _._ She treats that thing like one of her organs.”

           At the teen’s reaction, Violet shrinks even further. If Therissa of all people disapproves, what she did must be pretty bad. Violet didn’t think it was possible for her to feel any worse than she already felt, but apparently she was wrong. Very, very wrong.

           When Violet first arrived at Ericson, she and her mother were greeted by a sickeningly cheerful woman at the front gates who brought them into a big, red brick building to meet the headmaster. The meeting was long and boring, and, in Violet’s opinion, the headmaster asked her way too many questions. For the last few minutes, she was asked to wait outside of his office while he and her mother talked alone. Violet couldn’t have left the room any faster. She knew they were going to be talking about her, about what was wrong with her. And she sure as hell didn’t want to be around to hear it.

           Eventually her mother left without so much of a hug or a kiss goodbye, and Violet was shuffled off to the dormitory by another faculty member who dropped her off at her room, handed her a key, and instructed her to go inside and get settled in before dinner. Violet reluctantly did as she was told, not having much of a choice. But before she even reached for the knob, the door flew open. That was when she first met Brody.

_Violet’s room key clatters to the floor as she is practically pounced on by a girl in pigtails and a greenish-blue striped shirt. She immediately becomes uncomfortable and takes a step back, making brief eye contact with the girl only so she can glare at her and hopefully ward off any further attempts at socialization. But the girl is unaffected and, instead, beams at Violet brightly._

_“Hi, I’m Brody! We’re gonna be roommates!” The girl, Brody, is unable to control her excitement. She has been looking forward to Violet’s arrival the entire morning, when she and Therissa were suddenly called to the administrative office only to be told that they would be getting a new roommate that afternoon. “What’s your name?”_

_Violet doesn’t answer. If Brody thinks that she’s in any mood to talk right now, she’s sadly mistaken. She just wants to be left alone. Violet crosses the wooden floors, dragging her duffle bag behind her and tossing her backpack up into the top bunk of the unoccupied bed._

_The name tag attached to her new roommate’s luggage catches Brody’s eye, and she tilts her head at an odd angle so she can read it. “Vi…Violet? Your name’s Violet? That’s a pretty name.”_

           During their first encounter, Brody rambled on and on about things that Violet didn’t want to hear at the time, like things about Ericson and wanting to give her a tour of the school. She asked her a bunch of questions that Violet never answered. When it was time for everyone to head to the dining hall for dinner, Brody tried her best to convince Violet to join her, but the stubborn girl refused. She didn’t come down from her bunk the entire night.

_“This is for you.”_

_A few days later, Brody stands in front of Violet and holds out a purple notebook and matching pen. The pen has fluffy purple feathers and a big, yellow smiley face on the top end that Violet thinks looks stupid._

_“It’s a journal. You can write whatever you want in it,” Brody explains, trying to get her roommate to accept the gift. “I was thinking that it might help. I have one too.” She gestures with her thumb to her bed. Violet’s eyes follow Brody’s finger and spots the diary laying right on top of her pillow. “I write in it whenever I’m mad or sad, or when I’m scared. It always makes me feel better.”_

_Violet just stares at her, and it soon becomes obvious that she has no intention of taking the notebook and pen. Brody tries one more time, looking directly into her roommate’s eyes as if searching for even the tiniest reaction. “Dr. Larson says that it’s a good way to, um, express yourself.” Nothing. “Well, I’m just gonna leave these on your desk, okay?”_

           Thinking back on her first days at the boarding school, Violet wishes that she was a little nicer to Brody. She was only trying to make her feel welcome after all. Now that they’re friends, Violet can’t even imagine treating Brody that way on purpose. Guilt weighs heavy on her heart as she remembers the exact day that she said those unkind words about Brody’s diary.

_Having been at Ericson for nearly two months, Violet has grown pretty used to her new life. On one sunny Saturday afternoon, she and Brody are sitting under one of the shady trees in the courtyard. While waiting for her friend to finish writing yet another one of her diary entries, Violet chomps on an apple in one hand and uses her other to play around in the dirt with a stick that she found._

_Violet waits for what seems like forever. She’s now down to the last of her apple, gnawing on the core to make sure she gets every last edible bit, every now and then glancing back at Brody to check if the girl is ready to go yet. They’re supposed to be at the gym right now. Brody promised that she would shoot a few hoops with her before free time ends._

_Popping the rest of the apple, core and all, into her mouth, Violet chews impatiently and wipes her sticky fingers onto her jeans. She spits the seeds into the grass and turns to her friend again. “Are you done yet?”_

_“Hold on,” Brody replies without looking up. “I just have to finish this part.”_

_“You said that already,” Violet says, slightly annoyed. “Like an hour ago.”_

_Brody looks at her watch. “We’ve only been out here for twenty minutes. I told you that I’ll play ‘Pony’ with you after I finish this last bit.”_

_“Brody, it’s called ‘Horse.’_ ”

_But Brody has already resumed writing. Violet’s bored out of her mind. She leans back against the tree trunk and sighs loudly. She really wants to play some basketball before the bigger kids come and hog the courts like they always do around this time of day. Maybe it’s already too late._

_“Why do you always have to write in that thing anyway?” Violet wonders aloud. “Diaries are so dumb.”_

_Brody’s pen freezes and hovers over the half-filled journal page. “That’s mean, Vi.”_

_“Yeah, well, I wouldn’t wanna waste all my time talking to a_ _book_ _, that’s all.”_

_Ignoring Violet’s comment, Brody nudges her bag of raisins towards her friend. “I’ll give you these if you’ll wait just five more minutes. Then we’ll go, okay?”_

_Violet huffs but then curiously peers over at Brody’s snack. Raisins aren’t her favorite, but she’s still a little hungry. She takes the bribe. “Fiiine. But if you’re still not done after that, I’m leaving without you.”_

           “I-I shouldn’t have said that…” Violet starts to get upset again. “I didn’t mean it, I was just-”

           “Hey,” Therissa cuts in. She snaps her fingers in front of Violet’s face, startling her into looking up. “Stop. Give her the night to cool down and then just explain to her again tomorrow that you didn’t take the diary. Hell, you could even offer to help her look for it if you wanna make sure you get back on her good side.”

           Therissa brings her gaze up to the ceiling and holds it there. When Violet glances over at her, she almost looks…sad? No, not exactly. Violet can’t pinpoint the teen’s emotion, but the atmosphere in the room changes and it’s making her a little nervous.

           “Violet?”

           “Yeah…?”

           “I get it. I know what it’s like to say things you don’t really mean. I do it too,” Therissa confesses. She doesn’t have to look down to know that her roommate is staring at her in shock. This is the first time she has expressed any sort of remorse for her actions, not to mention the first time she’s ever opened up to Violet about something personal. “But we have to remember that sometimes it comes back to bite us in the ass.”

           “Yeah,” Violet says softly, “I know…”

           Therissa thumps her youngest roommate on the back and gives her a tiny hint of a smile. “Don’t worry, when Brody finally finds that thing she’s gonna feel really stupid for blaming you.” And with that, the teenager climbs down from Violet’s bunk, leaving the blonde to her own thoughts.

           Violet decides to take her roommate’s advice to wait until tomorrow before she tries talking to Brody. Her friend’s anger should have faded by then. At least she  _hopes_  so. But more than anything, Violet just hopes that Brody’s diary turns up so that everything can go back to normal.


	4. Chapter 4

          The ticking of the clock is driving Brody insane. Not even half of first period has gone by and the girl is already on edge. She has been since yesterday. One thing’s for sure – until her diary is safe and sound in her hands again, she’s not going to be able to relax.

          There are two reasons why Brody keeps her eyes towards the front of the room this morning. One, because she’s a decent student and likes to show her teachers that she’s attentive and eager to learn. The other is because Violet sits behind her, one row back and two seats to the right, and they’re still not on speaking terms. It would be awkward if they made eye contact again, much like it was last night in their room.

          At dinner time, Brody went to the dining hall as usual and, although she told herself that she wasn’t going to think about Violet tonight, she noticed right away that the blonde girl was nowhere to be found. Brody sat with Erin, her friend from the swimming club, and tried not to think about her missing, or stolen, or teleported-to-another-dimension diary to no avail. It was all she could think about. It’s all she’s still thinking about.

          The teacher moves across the floor, occasionally gesturing to the diagrams and text on the blackboard. Her lips are moving – the tween squints really hard to make sure – but Brody doesn’t hear any of the words coming out of her mouth. Her mind is elsewhere.

_Brody returns from dinner to a dark, empty bedroom. Switching on the lights, she goes to her desk and sits down, sighing. She stares at the space next to her lamp and array of colored gel pens where her diary is supposed to be and frowns. The girl pulls open the middle drawer, grabs a few sheets of loose leaf paper and slaps them onto the desktop. Just because she doesn’t have her diary doesn’t mean she can’t still write._

_The girl loses track of time as she becomes absorbed into turning her feelings into words. She scrawls thought after thought onto the lined sheets. Soon the sound of the bedroom door opening brings Brody back to reality and she instinctively looks over, only to lock eyes with Violet, who has returned from dinner with Therissa. Her emotions are fresh from recalling that afternoon’s events for her diary entry, so she scowls and turns her head away._

_Brody returns to writing so quickly that she misses the crestfallen look that briefly appears on her friend’s face. Violet silently plops down at her own desk and rummages through her backpack, pulling out some supplies and busies herself with what’s probably homework. Every so often, Brody sneaks a glance towards Violet out of the corner of her eye. It doesn’t look like she’s looked up from her notebook even once, seemingly engrossed in whatever she’s scribbling into it._

_When her diary entry is complete, Brody lets out a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding. She feels a lot better now that she’s gotten all of her thoughts out on paper. The act of writing is almost cathartic for Brody. She scans over the paragraphs before deeming them satisfactory, then gathers the sheets into a neat stack before returning them to her desk drawer._

_Brody peeks up at the clock on their wall, then at Violet’s back, then back up at the clock. It’s getting closer to the time where they would usually hit the shower room together as part of their evening routine. For the first time ever, there’s a weird feeling in the air. Their bedroom is awfully, uncomfortably quiet. The auburn-haired girl furrows her brows and tries to identify the new feeling forming in the pit of her stomach. She’s not really mad anymore, but…she’s still upset. Brody concludes that it would be best for her to complete her nightly routine on her own._

          A knock on the classroom door shakes Brody from her thoughts. Ms. Baker pauses mid-sentence to open the door. From her seat, Brody can’t see or hear well enough to know who it is, but her teacher is definitely speaking to somebody. The classroom erupts into curious chatter about the mystery visitor who has interrupted their lesson.

          “All right, settle down,” says Ms. Baker, coming back inside. “Brody, someone’s here to see you.”

          Brody stiffens upon hearing her name and her breath hitches in her throat. Who’s here? The gears in Brody’s brain start whirring and she starts to worry. Could it be her mother? Did something bad happen at home? Is someone hurt? Or is she in trouble? Did someone tattle on her for yelling at Violet yesterday? The girl sits paralyzed in her chair.

          But her teacher gives her a reassuring smile. She gestures towards the door with a sideways nod. “Go ahead.”

          Brody’s legs feel like jelly as she stands up and slowly heads to the door. She takes a deep breath to try and slow her rapidly increasing heartbeat, then hesitantly steps into the hall. There’s a familiar face waiting for her. It’s Dr. Larson, the school therapist.

          “Sorry to interrupt you during class,” says Dr. Larson, reaching behind her clipboard. With a warm smile, she holds something blue and rectangular towards Brody. “Just had a feeling you would want this back. I hope you didn’t miss it too much.”

          This is not at all what Brody was expecting. Fingers quivering, she slowly takes the object from Dr. Larson and turns it over in her hands. It has the same cover, the same spine, the same damaged corner from when she accidentally dropped it down the stairs last year. This is undoubtedly her diary. But where was it? Did Dr. Larson find it? Or…could she have had it this whole time? Brody hugs the book to her chest. She’s starting to feel sick.

          “I found it behind one of the sofa cushions in my office. You must have left it there after our session yesterday,” Dr. Larson explains. She expected Brody to be happy to have her diary back, so she’s a little confused to see the deeply troubled look on the girl’s face instead. “Is something wrong?” Brody’s wearing a miserable expression that answers the doctor’s question. She senses that her little patient may need an emergency session with her. “Would you like to come down and talk about it?”    

          Brody nods, so Dr. Larson pops her head back into the classroom to let Ms. Baker know that she’s going to borrow Brody for a while. The two of them head to her office, where Brody sinks into her favorite corner of the sofa. Dr. Larson takes a seat across from her. With some of her other patients, especially the ones who only come to see her because it’s a school requirement, the woman usually begins the session by prompting conversation with a question or two. Brody, however, has willingly come to see her since she was ten and is usually the one who initiates their talks.

          “Dr. Larson?”

          Sure enough, Brody is the one who speaks first. But what Dr. Larson finds most concerning is how the girl’s voice sounds: timid and terrified.

          “I think I did something really, really bad.”


	5. Chapter 5

          If Dr. Larson had to describe Brody when she first came to Ericson, she would say that the child was, in the simplest terms, lost inside her own head. It was just a few days after Brody’s tenth birthday that she pulled up at the school’s iron gates in her family’s forest green SUV. All four of the young girl’s family members – five, if you count the family dog – came along to drop her off. The doctor only spoke with Brody’s parents for a few minutes, but they seemed like good folks who truly cared about their daughter’s wellbeing.

          Later that week, Dr. Larson received an envelope from the administrative building containing a copy of Brody’s school records, psychiatric evaluation results and other documents pertaining to her official diagnosis: generalized anxiety disorder. The hospital documents were all recent, all from within the past year, but her school file contained many, many incident reports dating as far back as when Brody was seven years old. Dr. Larson skimmed through the file. Brody had been pulled from her classroom several times over the years due to “fits of hysteria” that “disrupted the class” and “tantrums” that “disturbed the other children.”

          Dr. Larson is no stranger to the unfortunate reality that children with undiagnosed mental disorders often struggle for years both at home and in mainstream school environments, and all because nobody is aware of the fact that they need special support. It’s common for them to be mislabeled as troublemakers or attention-seekers out of plain ignorance. Most of the time, all that these “troubled youth” really need is consistency and a structured routine. The Ericson Boarding School’s mission is to provide these students with an environment that supports them and their individual needs so that they can thrive.

          Brody’s anxiety attacks were frequent and severe during her first few months at the boarding school. The child didn’t understand her anxiety, nor did she have any sort of defense against it, so it would easily take over her mind. Dr. Larson had to start from zero with Brody. The first few times Brody was brought to her office for an anxiety attack, the child was clearly frantic and scared. It was nearly impossible to calm her down. There were also a couple of instances when Brody got herself so worked up that she made herself physically sick. And this, according to her school records, was not a new occurrence.

          It took time and effort, but Dr. Larson gave Brody the tools she needs to combat her anxiety. She taught her breathing techniques to use during anxiety attacks. She taught her the “reality check” technique so she can self-regulate whenever she feels one coming. Brody has proved to be a natural storyteller with a particularly descriptive vocabulary for someone her age, so Dr. Larson knew that the journaling technique would be perfect for her. Brody took to her diary like a duck to water, and during their sessions they would always take some time to discuss the things she wrote.

          Dr. Larson helped Brody understand what having anxiety means, but, even more importantly, what it  _doesn’t_ mean. Just because she has an anxiety disorder doesn’t mean that she’s restricted. With every therapy session, Dr. Larson makes sure that Brody knows that she can do everything that any other kid can do. That she can be a dancer, a writer or whatever she wants to be. That she has the strength inside her to control her anxiety. That anxiety doesn’t make her weak. That it’s  _her_  body and  _her_  mind and she has the reigns.   

          Brody is a bright, friendly girl who has come such a long way in the two years since Dr. Larson started working with her. It’s been a joy watching her develop and grow, becoming more confident in herself and more in control of her anxiety. For several months now, Brody hasn’t had anything negative to report, and their sessions have consisted mostly of the girl’s stories about her extracurricular activities, what she’s learning in her classes, and the fun places her family takes her when they come to visit. However, the state Brody is in today is one that Dr. Larson hasn’t seen in quite a while. It’s more than a little concerning.

          “Will you tell me what happened?”

          There’s no response as Brody slips away momentarily. Her eyes glaze over and she’s tugging, scratching at the bracelet on her wrist. Her fingers curl around the beads and uncurl again. Dr. Larson can tell that she’s letting her mind wander again. She has to bring her back.   

          “Brody.”

          Snapping out of her trance, Brody pulls her hand away from her wrist and looks at her therapist apologetically. “Sorry.”

          “What happened?” Dr. Larson asks again, trying to get her patient to focus.

          “Well…” Brody doesn’t know where to start. “Yesterday, after lunch, I went back to my room to get my diary… You see, I usually keep it on my desk, so I thought that’s where I left it. I mean, I wrote in it a little that morning, and that’s where I remembered seeing it last. But then…it wasn’t there _._ I looked for it everywhere, but it wasn’t… _anywhere_. So I wondered if maybe I accidentally dropped it somewhere, but I didn’t remember bringing it with me to class that day. And so then I thought…that maybe…” Brody’s voice gets quieter as she feels more and more ashamed, “maybe someone took it.”

          The doctor has an idea of where this is going.

          “I just… I completely forgot about our meeting in the morning!” Brody cries mournfully. “And Vi…I blamed her! I was just so…so mad…and worried…and I wasn’t, I wasn’t thinking… And I yelled at her in front of everybody!”

          “Has Violet ever done anything that made you think she took it?” Dr. Larson asks. The doctor has only met with Violet twice. Both sessions were mandatory visits, and both times she was unsuccessful at getting the reserved child to say a word. Everything Dr. Larson knows about Violet comes from Brody, who talks about her friend often.    

          “No!” Brody loves Violet and her first instinct is to defend her. “I mean…yes, I guess…”

          “I see. What kind of things?”

          “I guess she makes fun of me sometimes because I write in it so much,” Brody admits, going back to hugging her diary. “It makes me kinda sad, but I don’t think she’s trying to be mean…”

          “And you’ve told Violet how that makes you feel?”

          Brody shrugs. “Sort of, but I don’t think she was really listening.”

          Dr. Larson hums. “I think you should tell her. She’s your friend, isn’t she?”

          “She’s my  _best_  friend…”   

          “In that case, you've got nothing to worry about,” reassures Dr. Larson. “It seems like there are some things that need to be cleared up between you two. You thought Violet stole your diary because she’s made you upset about it before, correct?”

          Brody nods guiltily.

          “So you blamed her, but it turns out that she didn’t take it. How do you think Violet felt when you yelled at her?”

          The girl stares at her knees. “I probably hurt her feelings…and embarrassed her in front of the entire lounge…”

          “What do you think you should do?”

          “Apologize,” Brody answers, sitting up straighter. “I have to tell her I’m sorry.”

          Dr. Larson smiles. “You’ve got a good heart, Brody. Next time you feel angry at somebody, why don’t you try using your breathing tricks? Remember, we breathe and-”

          “We take control of our thoughts,” Brody finishes.

          “You should be proud of yourself,” Dr. Larson tells her. “But you should also be proud of the things that make you happy. Make sure Violet understands what your diary means to you.”

          The girl nods, but still doesn’t look any less troubled. “I hope she’s not mad at me.”

          Just then, the bell chimes and Brody’s eyes dart to the clock on the wall. First period is over, so she only has ten minutes starting  _now_  to find Violet, talk to her, and still make it to her next class without being late. She has history next, which means… Brody closes her eyes and pictures her friend’s class schedule. Science. Violet should have science next.

          “I should go,” Brody says, scooting off the sofa. She moves quickly, knowing that she doesn’t have much time if she wants to do this now. “I need to find Vi.”

          Dr. Larson stands as well so she can see Brody off. “Are you feeling better?”

          “Yeah!” Hand on the doorknob, Brody realizes she almost forget something else. She hurries back and gives the woman a quick but warm hug. “Thanks, Dr. Larson.”

          “Good luck with Violet. Tell her I said ‘Hello.”’

          Brody smiles for the first time that day and waves goodbye. “I will!”

          The twelve year old has butterflies in her stomach as she walks briskly – running is against the rules – down the hallways in the direction of the science hall. The only thing on her mind is her need to make things right with Violet as soon as possible.


	6. Chapter 6

          After Brody got called into the hallway, she didn’t come back for the rest of class. Now the lesson is over and, while the other students pack up their things and start to leave the room, Violet looks over at Brody’s desk. Two of the girl’s colored pens lie next to her open textbook, and her backpack rests by its straps on the back of her chair. Violet wonders if she should pack up her friend’s things for her, but the thought is short-lived as she suddenly feels a sharp pain between her shoulder blades.

          Turning around to see where the poke came from, Violet comes face to face with a boy with messy brown hair, sneering at her and waving a wooden ruler in her face. “Hey there, Flower Girl.”

          Violet recognizes this boy as one of the school bullies. Not wanting to get involved, she shoves her belongings into her backpack and tries to flee.

          Although Violet’s feet are quick, the boy’s reflexes are quicker. He grabs her by the strap of her bag. “Hey! I’m talking to you!”

          The blonde freezes and looks around for help, but her teacher has stepped out of the room and most of her classmates have left, too.

          The boy laughs. “No need to look so scared. I just wanna talk.”

          “What do you want?” Violet tries to make herself sound tough, but it doesn’t work. Her voice squeaks out the second half of the question.

          “I saw what happened between you and Brody yesterday. Boy, was she  _pissed_ ,” he says nastily. “What did you do?”

          “I didn’t do anything,” Violet tells him, trying once again to pull away, but the boy’s grip tightens and she’s trapped.

          “Bullshit! Did you not hear what she was saying? Are you deaf, too? Or just stupid?”

          A few kids overhear the commotion and start to watch.

          “Brody can’t stand you!” The boy is smiling, thoroughly enjoying the attention. He also seems to be getting a thrill out of being so vile. “You better hang out with your other friends now, because she totally hates your guts.” Then he laughs loudly, mockingly, right in Violet’s face. “Oh, that’s right, you don’t have any!”

          Violet just wants to leave. Her head feels hot and there’s a knot in her stomach. Although she’s trying her best to ignore the bully’s words, they’re starting to get to her. Some of the other kids are laughing at her now, too.

          “What’s the matter, Flower Girl?” The boy forcefully shoves Violet’s bag towards her, causing her to stumble backwards and ram her back into the corner of the table. It hurts a lot, but Violet clenches her jaw and tries to ignore the pain. “Look at the poor, little flower. All alone. No friends.”

          More heads turn to look at Violet. Some kids even inch closer to get a better view.

          The boy roughly grabs Violet’s arm, and his whole hand wraps around her wrist. “Gross, look at you! You’re so scrawny.”

          “Let go of me!” Violet shouts, twisting her arm out of his grasp.

          “I know just what you need.” Smirking, the boy reaches into his backpack, pulling out a thermos. He raises it high into the air and waits until he has everyone’s attention. “Hey, everyone! Let’s water the flower so she can grow up big and strong!”

          At the boy’s choice of words, Violet realizes what’s coming. But she’s a little too late. Before she can dodge out of the way, he opens fire and splashes the contents of the thermos right into her face. There are a few shocked gasps, but most of the kids around her erupt into laughter. The drenched girl sputters and wipes the cold liquid out of her eyes. She examines the wet streaks now all over her clothes and even her shoes. Thankfully, it appears to be plain water, nothing sticky or smelly.

          Ms. Baker chooses that moment to return to the classroom, and she quickly spots the strange congregation of students in the back corner. “What’s going on over there?” At the teacher’s presence, the students quickly diffuse and go about their business as though nothing had happened.

          The boy grabs his things and shoots Violet one last rude face before darting out the door, calling behind him, “See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya!”

          Violet doesn’t know what to do. Her teacher is looking in her direction, calling her name, and is slowly coming closer. She doesn’t want Ms. Baker to see her like this, not when Violet knows that she’s just going to ask questions and get more teachers involved. Keeping her eyes on the floor, Violet grabs her backpack and runs for the door. Her mind is foggy and she’s not sure where her legs are carrying her. But she doesn’t care. Anywhere is better than here.

* * *

          Brody makes a stop at Ms. Baker’s classroom to pick up her things, but she almost slips and falls in the doorway. Catching herself just in time, Brody frowns and looks at the floor. Someone must have spilled their water bottle or something. She hopes it gets cleaned up before somebody gets hurt. After quickly gathering her belongings, Brody continues to the science lab and peers through the glass window in the door. She doesn’t see Violet. Maybe she’s just not there yet. Brody looks at her watch. Class starts in five minutes. She still has a little time.

          Deciding to wait for Violet inside, Brody enters the classroom and looks around. Everyone’s chatting amongst themselves.

          “Hi, Brody!” A girl with rainbow-colored braces grins and waves at her. “What are you doing here?”

          Brody smiles and waves back. “Hi, Erin. Just looking for Vi. Have you seen her?”

          “Oh, Violet?” Erin points to a desk in the back of the classroom. “She’s lab partners with Louis. Maybe ask him?”

          There’s an empty stool next to Louis which Brody assumes is Violet’s seat. Brody approaches the boy, who is sitting with his shoulders slumped and his head in his hands.

          “Louis, do you know where Vi is?” asks Brody.

          Louis lifts his head to look at Brody, then shrugs. “No, but if you see her, can you  _please_  tell her to come to class? I really don’t wanna cut open an eyeball by myself.” He shivers at the thought and makes a face.

          “An eyeball?”

          “Yeah, a cow eyeball. Mr. Stanley showed us a video of how to do it, and there was this black stuff that oozed out… It was so disgusting.” Louis shakes his head. “Violet is good with this kind of stuff. Not me.”

          More and more students are starting to take their seats, and Brody checks her watch again. Three minutes left. If she doesn’t leave now, she’s not going to make it to her own class on time. She will have to have to wait until later to talk to Violet. “I gotta go. If Vi comes, can you tell her I need to talk to her?”

          Louis gives a half-hearted thumbs up. “Sure, if I’m still alive.”

          Brody reluctantly heads to her next class, but there are so many thoughts racing through her head that she’s in no state to concentrate. She loves learning, so time spent in class always seems to fly by. But not today. Her brain obsesses over needing to apologize to Violet and her body is on edge. During the mid-morning break and again during lunch, Brody searches for her friend. She even returns to the dormitory before her afternoon classes to see if Violet’s there, but their room is empty.

          The worst part of the day is when Brody returns to class after lunch. Violet’s supposed to be in both of her afternoon classes, but Brody is forced to look at an empty desk and chair for what feels like the longest two periods of her life. Minutes drag on for hours. Brody can’t stop thinking about Violet. Why isn’t she coming to class? Is she okay? Where is she?

          The girl worries and worries.

          And worries.

          Finally, the dismissal bell rings and Brody has never jumped out of her seat so fast. She takes off running, this time not even caring that she’s breaking the rules, through the art center, cutting through the lower school building, and into the dormitory. Brody leaps up the stairs two at a time, nearly tripping over the last step, and stumbles into her bedroom.

          Therissa is sitting in front of her desktop vanity mirror, reapplying her lip gloss, when Brody bursts loudly through the door. The teen jumps and whips her head around. “Fuck, Brody, what’s wrong with you?”

          “Th…Therissa,” Brody pants, “have you…seen Vi?”

          “Uhh, no,” Therissa replies, raising an eyebrow at her roommate, whose cheeks are bright red and forehead is shiny with sweat. The girl is hunched over, breathing heavily, and looks like she just ran a marathon. “So you guys finally made up?”

          “No… We… I haven’t…seen her all day! She wasn’t…at lunch…or in class! Sh-she…”

          Not only is Brody completely out of breath from her sprint through the campus, but she’s also starting to get worked up over the situation with Violet. It’s getting harder for the girl to catch her breath. An all-too-familiar feeling of panic settles over Brody. Her heartbeat suddenly becomes ten times louder and she can hear it pounding in her ears. Her lungs stop working and she’s suffocating. Brody tries to suck in as much air as she can with each of her jagged gasps, but her chest is too tight and the oxygen just isn’t getting in.

          “I…can’t… V-Vi… She…”

          Brody’s fingers and toes are tingling. She tries to move towards her bed but her legs give out. Therissa curses under her breath and jumps up, catching Brody before she hits the floor.

          “All right. Okay. Let’s sit down.”

          Therissa helps her roommate to her bed and sits her on the edge of the mattress. It’s been so long since Brody has had one of her anxiety attacks. The teen crosses her fingers that she still remembers what to do. Brody clutches at her chest with a shaky hand and opens her mouth as though she wants to say something, but nothing comes out besides more hysterical gasps for air.

          “Hey, look at me,” Therissa says calmly but firmly, bending over so that she’s at eye level with her roommate. Brody’s glassy eyes meet hers. “You’re going to be fine.”

          Therissa gets into a more comfortable position, kneeling on the floor in front of Brody. “Deep breaths. From here.” The teenager rests one of her hands lightly on the younger girl’s stomach as a reminder for her to breathe using her diaphragm. “Match me. Nice and slow. Ready?” She demonstrates a few deep breaths so that Brody can follow along.

          “In.” Therissa lifts her free hand into the air as she inhales to help Brody visualize a slow, deep breath. After holding the breath for a few seconds, Therissa exhales and lowers her hand. “And out.”

          The first few breaths were difficult for Brody, and as much as she tried to make them as smooth and effortless as Therissa’s, they still came out ragged and uneven. But the teen praises her anyway, telling her she’s doing good. That alone comforts Brody and she doesn’t feel as afraid. Eventually, her heart rate returns to normal and it’s much easier to breathe. Therissa was right. She’s going to be okay.

          With Brody finally starting to calm down, Therissa tries to lighten the mood. “See? You were just winded. Did you, like, run all the way up the stairs or something?”

          Brody doesn’t answer, still focusing on her breathing.

          Therissa pushes herself to her feet and takes a seat next to her roommate. “So, what were you saying about Violet?”

          “I don’t know where she is,” Brody answers, now able to speak in complete sentences again. “The last time I saw her was this morning. She wasn’t at lunch…and she didn’t come to our last two classes!”

          “Sounds like she’s just skipping class again.”

          “No, Therissa, I’m telling you,” Brody insists, “she’s gone. I think…I think she’s mad at me. I was really, really awful to her yesterday… What if she never comes back and it’s all my fault?”

          “Brody, chill,” Therissa says before realizing those aren’t the words she should be using with someone who just came out of an anxiety attack. “I mean, I’m sure she’s around somewhere. She’ll be back.”

          “But when?” cries Brody, clearly still upset and worried.

          “Look, she’s got to come back to the room to sleep, right? We’ll be here when she gets back.” Therissa does her best to keep Brody’s stress levels down. She nudges the girl lightly with her elbow. “Don’t beat yourself up over it, either.”

          Brody scoots until she’s sitting against the wall with her knees to her chest. “Will you wait for her with me?”

          Before Therissa can reply, there’s a knock at the door. The teen furrows her brows and clicks her tongue in slight annoyance. She’s got her hands full with Brody and doesn’t really have time to deal with whoever’s waiting outside. She begrudgingly gets to her feet to see who it is.

          “What do you want?” Therissa asks impatiently as she yanks the door open, expecting the visitor to be Justin or some other kid. Instead, she finds two faculty members – a man and a woman – standing the doorway. “Oh, shit. My bad.”

          The man chooses to ignore Therissa’s language and greets her with a curt nod. “Ms. Lannister. Please pardon the intrusion, but may we come in?”

          Therissa says nothing, but steps aside to let the adults into the small bedroom. The woman shuts the door behind them. Crossing her arms, the teen plops herself back down next to Brody and silently watches them.

          Spotting the other girl sitting on the bed, the man nods towards Brody as well. “Ms. Burress.”

          For a few uncomfortable moments, the two girls watch as the adults move their eyes slowly and meticulously across every inch of their room as though investigating a crime scene. The man leans over and scans underneath both bunk beds, and the woman crosses the floors to the closet.

          “May I?” she asks, one hand on the sliding door.

          The teen rolls her eyes. “Whatever.”

          The woman opens the closet cautiously as though expecting some kind of monster to jump out. Finding nothing out of the ordinary, she turns back around. She and the man exchange glances and mumble a few words to one another under their breaths.

          Something clammy touches Therissa’s arm and the teen feels Brody wiggle closer to her. Without tearing her glare away from the adults, she unfolds her arms and allows Brody to slip her hand into one of hers.

          “So, like, are you guys gonna tell us why you’re here, or…?” Therissa breaks the silence and tries to get an explanation as to what’s going on.  

          Muttering one last thing to the man, who nods at her, the woman turns toward the girls and clears her throat. “Now, we don’t mean to alarm you, but we came to ask if either of you know anything regarding Ms. Gideon’s whereabouts.”

          Therissa looks to her side and watches all the color drain from Brody’s face. Even though she knows it probably won’t do much good, she gives the younger girl’s hand a squeeze to remind her that she’s not alone. Violet may be Brody’s friend, but she’s Therissa’s roommate, too. They’re going to get through this together.


	7. Chapter 7

          The woman continues.

          “We’ve been informed by Ms. Gideon’s teachers that she hasn’t attended any of today’s lessons after first period. We were wondering if she mentioned anything to either of you about her intent to skip class, or, perhaps, spend the day elsewhere?” 

          “Uh, no,” answers Therissa, glancing to the side to see that Brody has started to cry. “We saw her this morning and that’s it. She didn’t tell us anything.”

          “Have you noticed any changes in her behavior? Anything out of the ordinary?” asks the man. “Any signs that Ms. Gideon has been upset or out of sorts recently?”

          Brody wails.

          “Are you all right, dear?” The woman turns to Brody. “We’re sorry, we don’t mean to scare you. We’re currently working on locating Ms. Gideon, so you don’t have to worry. We’re just trying to get some more information.”

          “Actually, yeah,” says Therissa. “These two,” she nods towards Brody slightly, “got into a fight yesterday. Haven’t made up yet.” The teen purposely omits some of the finer details, such as Violet getting upset to the point of tears, because she doesn’t want Brody to feel worse.

          “I see. Do you have any idea where she might have gone?”

          Therissa shrugs. “No idea. Brody?”

          Snivelling, Brody also shakes her head.

          “Well, thank you both,” the woman says, jotting something down onto her clipboard. “We’ll have her back soon. But if she ends up coming back on her own, could you please let the office know?”

          “Yeah,” Therissa promises, starting to feel a tad bit worried about her blonde roommate herself. The adults let themselves out and once the door shuts behind them, Therissa runs a hand through her hair, needing a moment to take in the situation. Where did that little idiot go?

          “She hates me!” Brody blurts out tearily. “I made her mad and now she hates me!”

          Yesterday’s events are still fresh in Therissa’s mind. “Trust me, that girl does not hate you.”

          “What if she got outside the gates and ran away? She could be lost…or…or she could be hurt! She might never come back and it’s my fault!”

          “Brody,  _please_.” Therissa closes her eyes and rubs her temples. It’s taking everything in her to not start shaking Brody and telling her to snap out of it. She needs a minute to think and her roommate’s ramblings are making it really difficult to concentrate.

          “Now she’s gone…and I never even got to say ‘sorry’…!”

          Moving so that she’s facing Brody, Therissa holds her roommate firmly by the shoulders. “All right, listen up. I’m gonna need you to pull yourself together.”

          Brody is confused but looks up. “What…?”

          “You can either sit here and cry for the rest of the day, or you can come with me.

          The girl sniffles and uses the edge of her shirt to dry her eyes. “Where are you going?”

          “To look for Violet.”

          This catches Brody’s attention. “Really?”

          “Yeah.” Therissa goes to put on a jacket and her beanie. “Adults are useless. They’re not gonna know where to look.”

          “But Therissa,” Brody frowns, “do you know where she might be?”

          “Not a clue,” the older girl answers truthfully. “But you will.”

          Today has left Brody feeling rather low and her usual positivity is nowhere to be found. “But Vi didn’t tell me anything. How should I know?”

          “Uhh, gee, I wonder,” Therissa says sarcastically. “One, because you’re her best friend. Two, you’re the only person in this  _entire school_  that she cares about. Three, you know her better than anyone else here. Do you need more reasons?”

          “I dunno…” There are a lot of doubts running through Brody’s head. “What if-”

          “Come on, Brody. Who knows Violet better than you do?” Therissa has her boots on and has grabbed a flashlight from the closet. She shines it into Brody’s face, causing the girl to squint and hold her hands in front of her eyes.

          “Hey!”

          “Let’s move it,” Therissa presses, tossing Brody her jacket. The younger girl listens and puts on the garment, but her face still looks hesitant. The teen taps her foot and switches the flashlight on and off, on and off, on and off while pointing it at Brody. “You want her to come back, don’t you?”

          “I do, but-”

          “Then let’s go get her.”

          Brody and Therissa walk the entire campus looking for their missing roommate. They loop through the school buildings first, looking in every classroom, searching behind every bookshelf in the library, and even popping into the nurse’s office  _and_ lower school building just in case they catch sight of Violet or run into anybody who has. The campus isn’t huge, but it is decently sized in order to accommodate Ericson’s 160 or so students, so Brody’s already feeling a little worn out by the time she and Therissa finish. They sit on the steps of the administrative building to take a short breather, as well as figure out where they’re going to look next.

          As it gets closer to dinner time, there are fewer and fewer students left outside, most having gone back to their rooms. Other than the fact that it’s getting late, there may be one more reason why everyone seems to have sought shelter. The sky is getting darker, and suddenly there are huge, grey clouds looming overhead.

          “It’s not supposed to rain tonight, is it?” asks Brody. Although she can already see the answer for herself, she’s hoping that Therissa tells her that she’s wrong.

          Therissa curses and stands back up, extending a hand to Brody and pulling the girl to her feet. “We’d better grab an umbrella or something.”

          Only returning to their dorm room briefly to gear up for what looks like inevitable showers, Therissa and Brody resume their search. The two girls stand outside of the dormitory building, deciding where to go next.

          “Maybe we should just circle around that way.” Therissa points to the left with her black umbrella. “Unless you know of any place Violet might have gone specifically. That would be nice.”

          Brody, now clad in a full-body rain poncho, kicks at the brick path with the toe of her rain boots. “Maybe we could check that little flower patch in the back corner of the school? She brought me there before.”

          “Yeah. I have no clue what you’re talking about, but lead the way.”

          The younger girl walks half a step in front of Therissa, pointing somewhere ahead of them. “Did you know that Vi knows a lot about flowers?”

          Therissa sniggers slightly. “Flowers?”

          “Well, you know how my family comes here on visiting days? Sometimes, after they go home, I feel kinda sad…”

* * *

_After a long day of fun with her mom, dad and brothers on a special off-campus excursion, the time comes for Brody to say goodbye._ _This is_ _the part she hates the most. She gets lots of hugs and kisses from Mom and Dad, and she even manages to steal a few hugs from Dawson and Hunter this time, too. They walk Brody to the front of the dormitory and reassure her, as always, that they will be back to visit again soon. They wave goodbye, and Brody waves back, watching their figures become smaller and smaller until they disappear out the front gates and out of sight._

_Brody returns to her bedroom in a gloomy_ _sort of mood, which often happens after her family leaves after a visit. She just needs to take her mind off of it. Luckily, Violet is there, reading the book that she lent her last week. Maybe they can watch a movie together. Grabbing her portable DVD player from her bottom desk drawer, Brody climbs up into her friend’s bunk._

_“Vi, wanna watch a movie with me?”_

_Violet only now notices Brody is back. She was so absorbed in the book she was reading that she didn’t hear her come in. “Oh, you’re back! You know, this book is actually really interesting. I can’t believe-“_

_“I have a new one we can watch. It’s really good,” Brody continues, not appearing to have heard Violet at all. “Wanna watch it?”_

_Violet wonders why Brody sounds kind of strange, but she agrees anyway, sticking the corner of her blanket in between the book pages as a makeshift bookmark. “Okay.”_

_The blonde moves to the side to make room for Brody, who fiddles with the DVD player and silently sets up the movie for them. Violet notices right away that her friend seems a little off. She’s not looking at her. She’s not talking. Brody places the device in between them and settles in, moving so that she’s lying on her stomach, and Violet follows suit. The movie starts playing, but Violet can’t help but sneak an occasional glance towards Brody. The girl’s eyes are on the screen but Violet can tell that she’s not really watching._

_“Are you okay?” Violet asks._

_Brody blinks and looks towards Violet. “Huh?”_

_“You’re acting weird.”_

_In a matter of seconds, Brody’s face crumbles and she bursts into tears._

_Violet mildly panics, as she usually does whenever people she cares about are upset. She awkwardly reaches out, with the intent of patting her friend on the arm, but then decides against it, feeling a little too embarrassed. “What’s wrong?”_

_Brody explains that she’s just sad because she misses her family. Violet feels bad because there’s nothing she can do to fix it. If Brody was crying because someone was mean to her, she could confront them and make them apologize. If it was because she lost something, Violet could help her find it. But Violet knows that she can’t change this and she feels useless._

_“It’s okay,” Violet says. There’s nothing else she can say. She can’t tell Brody that she understands how she feels because she doesn’t. Her family doesn’t visit. She doesn’t miss them. She doesn’t want to see her dad. The only thing Violet can do is stay with Brody until she feels better._

_Unless…_

_Violet climbs over Brody and reaches under her mattress, pulling out a small book._

_“Um, Brody?”_

_Brody sniffles. “What?”_

_“I wanna show you something,” Violet tells her, “but you have to come with me. Outside.”_

_Curious, Brody sits up and nods, tears coming to a stop. She follows Violet downstairs and out of the dormitory. “Where are we going?”_

_“Over there,” Violet replies, pointing_ _towards the far_ _end_ _of the campus_ _._

_Brody tries to get a better look at the book her friend’s carrying in her left hand, but she can’t tell what the cover says while they’re moving. “What’s that book?”_

_“You’ll see.”_

_The girls keep walking through the campus until they reach the back wall. In the_ _very corner is some tall, overgrown grass and a colorful selection of wildflowers. The majority of the greenery on the Ericson campus is neatly groomed and regularly maintained by the school staff, but this particular area is so isolated and rarely visited that even the gardeners have left it untouched. Brody has never seen this part of the school before. She looks around at the flowers in awe._

_Violet walks over to some pale magenta flowers blooming in clusters._ _“These are rhododendrons.”_

_“Those are pretty,” Brody comments, moving closer to her friend, who is now flipping through her book. Violet finds the page she’s looking for and holds it out for Brody to see._

_It’s a botany book, more specifically a guide on wildflowers of the Southeastern United States. Violet shows the rhododendron page to Brody for a moment, but then skips forward several pages and shows her another page. There’s a picture of a red and yellow flower shaped like a pair of dragonflies._

_“Columbines,” Violet says, pointing to the flowers behind Brody that match the photo in the book, “And those purple ones are geraniums.”_

_Brody crouches near the flowers to get a better look. “I really like those. Ger…ger-nari-”_

_“Geraniums,” Violet repeats with a small smile. “They were Grandma’s favorite, too.”_

_Kneeling beside her friend, Violet plucks a simple white flower with a yellow center and hands it to Brody. “Do you know what this one is?”_

_“A daisy?”_

_Violet’s smile turns into a cheeky grin. “Nope. It looks like a daisy, but it’s not. It’s actually chamomile. You can tell by the shape of the leaves.” The girl flips through her book until she finds the page on the chamomile flower, then shows it to Brody. “They don’t really look special, but I kinda like these the most.”_

_Mind no longer focused on missing her family, Brody is starting to feel better. She giggles. “Maybe I should call you ‘Daisy’ instead of Violet.”_

_Violet_ _’s face twists into a grimace. “Please don’t.”_

_“Are there any violets here?” Brody picks up a few strands of Violet’s hair and holds them between her thumb and forefinger, as though she’s holding a flower stem, and pretends to sniff it. “Or are you the only one?”_

_Turning slightly pink, Violet puffs up her cheeks and pouts. But as much as she hates being teased about her name, Violet can see that Brody looks a lot happier now compared to earlier. She figures she can let it slide just this once. Violet tucks the stem of the chamomile flower behind Brody’s ear and turns to the one remaining flower she hasn’t told her friend about yet._

_“What’s that one?”_

_Without needing to look inside her flower guide, Violet reaches out and touches a pink and orange petal with the tip of her finger. “Honeysuckle. It can come in lots of other colors, like white, yellow or red.” Her hand moves down a few inches and snaps a small sprig of flowers and leaves from the plant. Violet fiddles with the flowers for a while before offering them to Brody. She doesn’t make eye contact, and there’s a tinge of embarrassment in her voice as she adds, “Grandma told me that honeysuckle brings happiness to people who are feeling sad.”_

_Touched by Violet’s sweet gesture, Brody accepts the flowers with a soft smile. “Thanks.”_

* * *

          “You know, it would actually be kind of hilarious if we found  _Violet_  in a flower patch,” Therissa remarks.

          Brody is still too worried about her friend to find this funny. She shakes her head and speeds up, wanting to reach the back wall as soon as possible. “Let’s just go and see if she’s there.”


	8. Chapter 8

          Brody is disheartened when she and Therissa finally arrive at the back wall only to find it as empty and quiet as ever. The girl looks this way and that, squinting into the distance for any sign of Violet, but there’s nothing. Nobody. She calls her friend’s name a few times, each time yelling it louder and louder, but the only response she gets is silence.  

          “Give it up. She’s not here,” Therissa says, tugging on Brody’s poncho. “It was a good try, though, I’ll give you that.”

          “I really thought she might be here…”

          Therissa nudges the girl onward. “Where to next?”

          “Ah! I just remembered!” Brody’s head snaps up, eyes wide. “We still have to finish checking the gym!”

          When the girls had stopped by the school gymnasium earlier to search for Violet, the upper school wrestling team was in the middle of a closed practice. Brody and Therissa weren’t allowed inside the main gym, so they were only able to check the girls’ locker room and the dance studio. They meant to check back again before they started looking outside, but it seems as though it slipped both of their minds.

          Brody looks at her watch. “It’s almost dinner time, shouldn’t they be done by now?”

          “Yeah, let’s go look.”

          Brody and Therissa head back to the gym and, sure enough, the rowdy group of teenage boys from earlier that afternoon is gone. They head straight to the main gym, where most of the sports teams meet. Ericson’s basketball team, volleyball team, badminton team and wrestling team all practice and hold their matches here.

          “I’ll check under the bleachers. I may or may not have used that hiding place myself once upon a time. You can get away with a lot of shit under there,” Therissa tells Brody, waving her away to the opposite end of the room. “You take that side.”

          Eyes scanning the colorful court lines at her feet, Brody walks to the center of the floor, vaguely remembering which lines Violet would tell her to stand behind whenever they played basketball together. As more of a gymnastics and dance kind of girl, Brody isn’t really into ball sports, but her friend really, really enjoys basketball. Sometimes Brody wonders why Violet keeps wanting to play with her when both of them know how much she, well,  _sucks_  at it.

          The auburn-haired girl is clumsy on the court, and she almost never throws the ball high enough, or hard enough, or in the correct direction to get it into the basket. But Violet is patient with Brody, giving her tips, little words of encouragement, and cheering really loudly whenever Brody  _finally_ manages to score a basket. Brody forgets the rules often. They just don’t seem to stick. Violet spends a lot of time repeating things and telling Brody what she’s doing wrong. At the end of the day, the two of them don’t get much “real” playing done, but Violet seems perfectly happy just to have somebody – even somebody like Brody – to play with.

          Bringing her eyes back up, Brody looks around. There’s a double door on the opposite wall that leads to the storage room. “Do you think she’s in the closet?”

          Therissa snorts and bursts out laughing at Brody’s choice of words. “Well, you guys are still young. We might not know for a couple years.”

          The double entendre flies over young Brody’s head. “What?”

          “Do  _you_  think she’s in the closet?”

          “I’ll check!” The girl’s boots squeak as she runs across the floor. While Brody looks in the storage closet, Therissa ducks under the bleachers, but, after a minute, both reappear and share a look that confirms that Violet isn’t there either.

          “Let’s go back outside,” Therissa suggests right away, not wanting to give Brody time to dwell in disappointment at yet another dead end. “We’ve still got plenty of ground to cover.”

          Back outside, the weather has taken a turn for the worse. Raindrops are falling hard and fast despite the fact that not even five minutes ago the ground was bone dry.

          “Lovely,” Therissa mutters, unfolding her umbrella. “You good with that oversized garbage bag of yours?”

          Pulling the hood of her poncho over her head, Brody nods, and the two of them set out into the rain. They circle clockwise around the campus looking for Violet, Brody occasionally calling her name, but the girl remains M.I.A. It’s getting chillier out now that the sun has started to set and a strong breeze is blowing cold mist into their faces.

          “Hey!” Therissa has to raise her voice in order to be heard over the rain. Her shoes are uncomfortably damp and she’s a little envious of her roommate’s lame, clunky rain boots. At least Brody’s socks are probably dry. “This weather sucks and it’s freezing. Maybe we should go back.”

          Brody refuses, shaking her head. “No! I’m not going back without Vi.”

          “Maybe they found her already.”

          “No!”

          “Brody-“

          A sudden booming from above startles both girls, sending them nearly a foot into the air. It clangs again and again, and Brody’s hands move to cover her ears. Therissa cringes and tilts her head upwards, exposing herself to the rain, towards the source of the deafening noise. An enormous brass bell swings back and forth in the tower next to the girls, sounding a total of six times before stopping. There’s a lingering ringing in Therissa’s ears and she curses under her breath.  

          “Scared the shit out of me…” the older girl mutters. “Brody, let’s go. If anyone catches us out here this late, we’re so busted.”

          Brody is looking up at the bell tower. She’s not sure why, but something inside her is telling her that they shouldn’t leave just yet. It’s just a feeling. A hunch. Her stomach churns anxiously, and she lifts a finger to point to the top of the structure. “Up there.”

          Therissa almost laughs in disbelief. “You don’t really think Violet climbed all the way up there, do you?”

          There’s no time to answer. Brody takes off running to the front of the bell tower and tugs on the door handle, but it doesn’t budge. She goes around to the side entrance, trying that door as well, but it’s also locked shut. Determined to get inside, Brody circles the outside of the building looking for a way in.

          “The doors are all locked,” Therissa says. Her roommate is looking at the walls and windows as though she’s planning to scale the building. “I don’t think she’s here.”

          And then Brody sees it.

          “There!”

          One of the windows on the ground floor is slightly ajar. Brody pushes on it and it opens wide. There’s definitely enough space for someone her size, even Therissa’s size, to fit through.

          “Help me up, please?” asks Brody, hands already on the window ledge.

          Therissa sighs but tosses her umbrella aside so she can give the girl a boost. “I underestimated you, kid. You’ve got more guts than I thought.”

          Once Brody is through the window, the teen hoists herself up and into the building after her. They take a look around, but it’s dark and hard to see. Therissa switches on her flashlight and shines it around the room. There’s nothing there besides a few wooden crates and a barrel.

          “Vi?” calls Brody. The girls pause to listen for an answer, but they don’t hear anything. Wandering further inside, they come to an open doorway leading to the main part of the bell tower. Therissa steps inside, Brody at her heels, and they find themselves looking up at a tall, narrow staircase that twists up and up along the tower walls.

          As Brody moves to start climbing up the steps, Therissa grabs her by the shoulder. “Hey. Be careful. I swear to god, if you slip and kill yourself, they’re gonna pin that on me.”

          The girls ascend the rickety staircase, Therissa following behind Brody, on alert and ready to catch her roommate if she slips. Thankfully, they make it to the top without incident. There are several white marble pillars supporting the very top of the tower where the bell hangs, and beneath them is a square wooden platform surrounded on three sides by matching wooden railing.

          “Vi…?” Brody calls again, this time a little softer. There is nobody up in the bell tower. The pillars are so narrow that not even skinny little Violet could hide behind them. It appears to the girls that they have hit another dead end.

          A strong gust of wind blows through the tower, nearly tipping the younger girl over and showering them both with droplets of rain. Therissa’s arm instinctively shoots out to catch her. “Nope, you’re not falling to your death on my watch.”

          “She’s not here…” Brody’s voice is barely audible. “I thought for sure this would be it…” The poor girl is defeated. She feels like a failure. Pulling away from Therissa and carefully walking to the edge of the platform, Brody holds onto the railing and looks up at the sky. It’s still a bit too early in the evening to see the stars, not that they would even be visible tonight behind all the rainclouds. Another gust of wind blows and Brody starts to shiver, only now realizing how cold she actually is. “I hope Vi’s okay…”

          “Let’s go back?” Therissa suggests. “You never know, they might’ve found her.”

          The younger girl sighs and nods. “Maybe…”

          Therissa heads back to the staircase first so she can shine the flashlight down the steps. “Watch yourself going down. Seriously.”

          Brody is about to follow Therissa, but she pauses and looks around the bell tower one last time. She wants to be absolutely certain that her friend really isn’t up there. Her eyes follow the wooden railing from one end to the other, across three quarters of the platform. The girl frowns, finding it strange that there’s one whole side without a protective barrier. Isn’t that dangerous? Brody inches towards the unprotected end of the platform and tries to look over the edge.

          But it’s not an open edge. It’s a step onto another part of the building.

          The roof.

          “Therissa!” Brody shrieks. “Come back!”

          “What is it?”

          There’s almost no light left in the sky, so Brody can hardly see a thing. The pouring rain isn’t helping with visibility, either. But one thing’s for sure. There’s definitely something out there. It’s small and appears to be perched up against the railing near the opposite end of the roof. Brody points to the figure. “Over there. Do you see it?”

          Therissa shines the beam of the flashlight in the direction of Brody’s finger.

          The teenager’s heart nearly stops.

          Choking out a gasp, Brody leaps off the ledge. “VIOLET!”


	9. Chapter 9

 

          The wind blows Brody’s hood from her head as she jumps off the edge of the bell tower platform.  Her boots splash as they land on the flooding rooftop below and she rushes towards her friend. Therissa follows close behind, lighting a path for them with her flashlight while yelling at Brody to be careful. The girls approach Violet, but the short sense of relief that washed over them upon finally locating their missing roommate vanishes and is replaced worry.

          Violet sits motionless, curled up into herself so tightly as though trying to make herself disappear, and is completely drenched from head to toe. Every piece of clothing on her body is soaked and her hair is matted and plastered to her head. Her eyes are dark and empty, staring into nothingness. Therissa shines the flashlight in Violet’s direction and Brody calls her name, but the girl remains still and silent, giving no indication that she’s even aware of their presence.

          Crouching beside her friend, Brody can now see how violently Violet’s small frame is shaking. “Vi? Can you hear me?”

          Therissa bends down to get a closer look. Her youngest roommate is in pretty bad shape. She’s not responding to any of Brody’s questions. Not only that, but she doesn’t even seem to  _hear_ them. “Okay. Fuck. We need to get her inside.”

          “Vi, come on…” Brody reaches out and holds the sides of Violet’s face in her hands in an attempt to get the girl to look at her. To see her. “Please… Let’s go back…”

          The warmth of Brody’s palms against her friend’s icy cheeks seems to have rekindled the flame inside Violet’s brain. The frozen girl blinks and moves her head slightly.

          “Vi! You… You’re okay… Can you get up?” asks Brody, voice quivering almost as much as Violet’s body. She doesn’t get an answer. It’s almost as if Violet has lost her ability to speak. She turns to her older roommate for help. “W-what do we do?”

          Therissa shoves the flashlight at Brody and starts shrugging out of her hoodie. “You’re gonna help us get down from here.”

          “W-what?”

          After pulling her hoodie over Violet’s head and torso, Therissa scoops her up bridal style. She’s lucky that Violet weighs next to nothing or else this would be much more difficult. The teenager speaks to Violet, words as sharp as ever, but her tone is gentle and reassuring. “Hate to break it to you, but I’m not letting you freeze yourself to death. Okay? You’re coming back with us.”

          Therissa holds Violet’s frigid and limp body close. “Brody, you need to lead the way. Make sure we can see the stairs. I’m gonna have to carry her, but we need to go.  _Now._ ”

          Swallowing the lump that has formed in her throat, Brody finds her courage and nods. Therissa’s counting on her. Violet needs her. Grasping the flashlight tightly in her hands, Brody walks in front and leads the way, pausing every few steps to check on how Therissa and Violet are doing. Each of Therissa’s steps are careful and deliberate. She makes sure both feet are planted firmly on every wooden step before taking another, and she stops every so often to readjust her grip on the girl. The descent down the long staircase is slow and nerve-racking, but the teen grits her teeth and presses on.

          She swears on her life that she’s going to get this girl back on the ground safely.

          The rest of the journey from the bell tower to the dormitory is a blur. Therissa isn’t sure how she managed to carry Violet all the way back to their bedroom without falling or dropping her. It must have been the adrenaline. Her heart is still racing. Sure, Violet has been found, but they’re not out of the woods yet.

          “We’re gonna use your bed, okay?” Therissa tells Brody, out of breath and arms ready to give out any second. She sets Violet down on the bottom bunk. “Grab towels. Blankets. All of them.”

          Using the back of her hand, Therissa feels Violet’s forehead. Her skin is like ice and she’s pale as death. But the thing that frightens the teen the most is how much her roommate is shivering. She almost looks like she’s convulsing. They need to warm her up immediately.

          “All right, you can be pissed or whatever at me later, but this is so you don’t die,” warns Therissa before starting to strip Violet of her wet clothes. She takes her hoodie off, then peels the girl’s waterlogged top and undershirt off. Brody reappears, holding all three of their bath towels and blankets. “Brody, get her shoes and socks, will you?” Therissa unbutton’s Violet’s jeans and yanks those off as well. “Don’t worry, I’m not  _looking_. And you and Brody shower together, don’t you? Nothing she hasn’t already seen, either.”

          Once her clothes are off, Therissa and Brody wrap Violet in bath towels, two around her body and one around her head to absorb the water that’s still dripping from her hair. Taking one of the extra blankets that Brody grabbed, Therissa starts to layer it over the girl, but then pauses. “Hey, you wanna get in there?”

          Brody tilts her head at Therissa. “What?”

          The teen gestures at Violet with a nod of her head. “Body heat might warm her up faster.”

          No other explanation is needed. Brody shrugs out of her rain poncho, kicks off her boots, and then climbs into her bed right next to Violet. Therissa finishes wrapping her roommates in blankets and then heads for the door.

          “Stay put. I’m gonna go get someone,” says Therissa. “Keep talking to her, okay? And make sure she stays awake.”

          Violet is shaking really hard, and Brody can feel it through the layers of blankets. She feels awful for her friend. Wriggling her arms free inside Therissa’s blanket cocoon, Brody feels around for Violet’s hands. Finding them, she presses them in between her own to try and warm them up faster. Violet’s fingers are frozen. Her whole body is practically radiating cold.

          “You’re gonna be okay, Vi,” Brody tells Violet, snuggling up as close as she can against her. The auburn haired girl sighs. “You scared me… I was so worried that you were gone forever.”

          Violet doesn’t respond, but she turns her head slightly towards Brody.

          “I’m sorry…” Brody says, voice thick with emotion. “I’m so, so sorry. I know you didn’t take my diary. It was my own fault.”

          Violet’s teeth begin to chatter, and, concerned, Brody pulls away slightly to examine her. Violet’s mouth is open, jaw trembling, and she looks like she wants to say something. Brody waits and listens, but after a few moments of silence she figures that her friend is still too cold to speak.

          “I guess I accidentally forgot it in Dr. Larson’s office,” continues Brody, shamefully, “and she had it the whole time. I’m sorry for blaming you… I should’ve listened when you said you didn’t do it. I-I was just really, really upset…”

          “Y-you…don’t hate me…?” Violet’s voice is scratchy and dry as these are her first words since the morning. She coughs a little.

          “Hate you…?” Brody furrows her brows in confusion. “Of course not! You’re my friend.”

          Violet is tired. Really tired. Her limbs feel heavy and it’s taking a lot of effort to get her words out. “But…I was mean to you… I called your diary ‘stupid’…” Her voice is so quiet that Brody has to lean in extremely close in order to hear her. “But I didn’t…I didn’t mean it…”

          “I know.” Brody wraps her arms around Violet in a hug and rests her head on her shoulder. “It’s okay. You’re still my friend.”

          Violet closes her eyes as the embrace envelops her in warmth that seems to reach all the way through to her core. She uses the rest of her energy to lift one arm around Brody to return the hug. “Sorry…”

          After the girls hug it out, Brody pulls back again. “How are you feeling?”

          “Still cold…” Violet curls up tighter under the blankets. “And tired…”

          “Don’t worry, Therissa went to get help. She’ll be back soon,” reassures Brody.

          Now that she’s slowly warming up and her mind is less foggy, Violet realizes that Therissa’s the one who must have carried her back. She’s the one who must have dried her off and covered her with these blankets. Of course, Brody helped out, too, but…

          Suddenly everything clicks. Violet audibly groans.

          “Are you okay?” asks Brody, concerned.

          “I can’t believe Therissa saw me in my underwear…”

          Brody tries to stifle a giggle, but it doesn’t work.

          “It’s not funny,” Violet mumbles, frowning. She pictures her oldest roommate and pulls one of the blankets over her eyes in embarrassment. Speaking of Therissa, Violet hopes that she’s not going to come back to the room with a bunch of grown-ups in tow. She heaves a long, dreary sigh. “I’m gonna be in so much trouble…”

          The bedroom door bursts open with so much force that the doorknob rebounds off the wall, leaving a visible dent in the plaster. Preparing herself for the worst, Violet sinks deeper into the blankets.

          “Brody? Brody! How is she doing?”

          Violet wonders who this breathless, distressed voice belongs to because it certainly, couldn’t  _possibly_  be her tough, moody teenage roommate’s.  

          “Therissa! She’s okay!” calls Brody, giving a thumbs up from her spot on the bed. She then notices that another woman has followed Therissa into the room. “Hi, Ms. Martin.”

          Therissa rushes over to the edge of the bed and pulls the covers off of Violet’s head. The younger girl looks up at the teen sheepishly. Violet watches the older girl’s expression changes from worried to relieved. But then Therissa’s face contorts in anger, and Violet flinches as a hand comes towards her. Bracing herself, Violet squeezes her eyes shut. But Therissa doesn’t hit her. Instead, the teen pinches her cheek, not enough to hurt, but enough to show her disapproval. Brody, alarmed at the sudden display, watches her roommates anxiously with wide eyes.

          “You’re the biggest dumbass,” Therissa says, pulling on the girl’s cheek. “Don’t even _think_  about doing anything like that ever again, you hear me? Good lord, Violet…”

          Violet swallows and nods. The teen crosses her arms tightly across her chest and shakes her head, then quickly turns away and goes to stand by her desk at the food of the bed. She leaves so abruptly that Violet doesn’t have time to get a closer look, but she swears that Therissa’s eyes looked somewhat glassy. Glancing to the side at her friend, Violet wonders if Brody saw it, too.

          “Hi there,” Ms. Martin comes over to the bed and greets Violet. In one of her hands is her white nurse’s bag full of medical supplies. “Mind if I take a look? Just want to make sure you’re okay.”

          Brody moves off the bed to give the nurse some space. Ms. Martin takes Violet’s temperature and asks her a few questions. She also checks her pulse and listens to her breathing.

          “Well, girls, it looks like you found Violet just in time,” says Ms. Martin, taking the buds of her stethoscope out of her ears. She smiles and pats her patient on the shoulder reassuringly. “You’re going to be fine. Just stay under those covers until you feel better. Come and see me if you start feeling worse.”

          “Thank you,” Violet says softly.

          “Warm fluids should help,” Ms. Martin adds. “Would you girls like some hot cocoa? I’ll lend you my kettle for the night.”

          The two younger girls share a look and break out into excited grins. “Yes, please!”

          “Very well,” says the nurse, repacking her bag. “I’ll be back in a bit with the kettle and some dry sheets and blankets. Seeing as you girls haven’t had dinner yet, either, I’ll talk to the kitchen staff and see what we can do.”

          The three girls thank Ms. Martin, who steps out momentarily before returning with the promised items. She assists Brody and Therissa with moving Violet, still wrapped up like a burrito, to the other bed as they replace the wet blankets and sheets with dry ones. Before heading back to her office for the evening, Ms. Martin hands Therissa a few packets of hot chocolate mix and three mugs.

          Brody and Violet watch curiously as the nurse exchanges a few hushed words with their older roommate. The conversation is too quiet for them to eavesdrop, so they merely look at each other and shrug. After a few moments, Ms. Martin touches Therissa on the shoulder and smiles kindly at her before stepping back and addressing all three of them.

          “Take it easy tonight, girls,” she says. “You’ve been through a lot. I’ll drop by tomorrow morning to check up on you.”

          Brody and Violet bid the nurse goodnight. Therissa’s expression is still sour, but she gives a small wave as Ms. Martin leaves their bedroom. As soon as the door shuts, Therissa, wordlessly, goes to sit at her desk, leaving Violet feeling uneasy. Brody, preoccupied with boiling water in the kettle and emptying cocoa mix into mugs, doesn’t notice the uncomfortable silence. Violet hugs the blankets around her more tightly, and not because she’s still cold.

          And even when Brody finishes preparing their drinks and the sweet aroma of chocolate fills the room, it doesn’t quite comfort Violet the way she thought it would.


	10. Chapter 10

          It didn’t take very long for Brody to pick up on the weird tension between Violet and Therissa. She knew there was something wrong the moment she announced that the hot cocoa was ready but was completely ignored by them both.

          Carefully setting the kettle down on her top of her desk, Brody looks towards her roommates and frowns, putting a hand on her hip. “Why are you guys being weird? We’re finally back together and everyone’s okay.”

          Violet and Therissa’s eyes meet for about half a second before they turn away from each other again. Brody goes to sit on the edge of her bed where she can see them both. Dr. Larson’s advice has become young Brody’s philosophy, and she decides to share her wisdom with her roommates. “Whatever it is, you should talk it out. It’s not good to bottle up your feelings.”

          Therissa rolls her eyes, though it goes unnoticed by Brody.

          Violet has reached the point of peak physical and mental exhaustion and isn’t happy that she now has to deal with another problem on top of it all. Feeling a mixture of confusion and frustration, she tries to figure out why the teenager seems to be pissed at her all of a sudden.

          “I’m sorry, okay?” Violet voices. She doesn’t have her words planned out. She’s just going with whatever comes out of her mouth. “I know that you’re mad. I did something stupid…and you had to waste your time to help me.” The eleven year old speaks to Therissa’s back because the teen is still refusing to look at her. “I didn’t mean to get you involved… I just…” Violet recalls her encounter with the bully earlier. “Forget it. I-I’m just… Sorry.”

          Therissa finally whips her head around to face Violet, but she somehow looks even angrier than before. “You  _idiot,_ I’m not pissed at you for running away again!”

          “Then why-“

          “I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU, OKAY?”

          Therissa turns back around, her outburst leaving Violet dumbfounded. She honestly doesn’t know what to say or how to react. The fact that Therissa is this concerned about her is surprising, not to mention entirely unexpected. It wasn’t Violet’s intention to make anybody worry. But she did. Therissa…and Brody…and probably her teachers and other school faculty.

          Brody approaches Violet and touches her arm. “Vi, here.”

          Looking up, Violet sees her friend handing her a bundle of clothes that she instantly recognizes as Brody’s own. White fleece pajamas covered in hearts and tiny ballerinas wearing pastel pink tutus. “Uh, what?”

          “You can wear these tonight,” Brody says. “I know you have your own pajamas, but these are really soft and warm. I don’t want you to be cold.”

          Violet blinks at the garments, eyeing them with slight distaste. Most of Violet’s “pajamas” aren’t really pajamas. Most of the time, she just wears a plain t-shirt or tank top with comfy shorts or sweat pants to sleep, depending on the weather. Brody, however, has a wardrobe full of designated outfits for every occasion, most of which were brought over when she first arrived at Ericson at age ten. Brody’s clothes are bright with whimsical patterns and prints which, Violet thinks, suit her friend perfectly.

          But Violet? Not so much.

          These pajamas are a two-piece set, with a matching top and bottom, much like the kind that a five year old would wear. The thought of wearing something like this embarrasses Violet. But Brody means well, and Violet doesn’t want to make her feel bad by saying that she doesn’t want to wear them. She fights back a grimace as Brody places them into her arms. “Um, thanks…I guess…”

          Shuffling off to the side to get changed, Violet makes sure nobody’s watching her before shedding her layers of blankets and towels. She hastily shoves her limbs into Brody’s pajamas. They’re a little baggy on Violet’s wooden plank-like figure, but the girl has to admit that Brody was right. They’re incredibly soft against her skin, like a cloud, and even though Violet doesn’t know what clouds feel like, she imagines that they would feel just like Brody’s pajamas. Violet has never owned pajamas like these before, at least not that she can remember.  

          Brody giggles. “They look cute on you.”

          Violet’s cheeks heat up, and rather than responding to Brody’s embarrassing comment, she pretends to busy herself with the tangle of linens on the floor. Violet knows right away which towel is hers, and she also recognizes Brody’s. There’s one more in the pile which, Violet figures, must belong to Therissa. Taking the towel in her hands, Violet quietly pads across the floor and over to the teen.

          “Um, thanks for…for the towel,” Violet says, holding it out to the teen. “Sorry for getting it all wet and gross.”

          Therissa finally turns to look at Violet.

          “And…I’m sorry…for…” The apology feels stuck in Violet’s throat but she forces it out anyway. She averts her gaze and takes a deep breath before continuing. “For worrying you. I won’t do it again.”

          Therissa’s tough front softens at her youngest roommate’s face. Sighing, the teen takes back her towel and tosses it onto her desk. “Oh, you’ll  _definitely_  do it again. Both of you.” Therissa extends the conversation to include Brody, who happily comes closer to join them.

          “I’ll  _try_  not to, then,” Violet corrects.

          “Me too,” adds Brody.

          As Therissa looks at her two roommates, she thinks back on everything that’s happened over the past twenty four hours. It was one hell of a crazy day for both Violet and Brody, and yet, for some reason, Therissa was right there with them through it all, whether it was keeping Violet company after her fight with Brody, or helping Brody through her anxiety attack and even teaming up with her to find Violet. For the first time, Therissa realizes that these two girls are no longer just some annoying kids that she’s forced to share her bedroom with. As much as she tried to keep Brody and Violet out of her life, they grew on her. The thought of it embarrasses Therissa to no end, but she admits that she  _kind of_ cares about them. And she  _kind of_ hates the idea of anything bad ever happening to them.  

          “I guess you guys aren’t as lame as I thought,” Therissa confesses, now sort of wishing that she had been a little nicer to them. “Sorry for…” The teen trails off, face turning bright red, and glares daggers at Brody, who’s smiling smugly, knowingly, in her direction. “Ugh, stop!” Therissa grabs her bath towel and tosses it into the girl’s face.

          “What were you saying?” asks Violet, innocently, but Therissa doesn’t miss the mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

          “ _Et tu,_  Violet?” Therissa groans into her palms. “Fine. I guess I’m sorry for being a huge bitch to you guys sometimes. Well, all the time.”

          “Not all the time,” Brody says, face serious again. “Right, Vi?”

          Violet nods in agreement, lips turned upward in a small smile.

          Therissa shakes her head, chuckling. “You twerps are pretty cool.”

          Brody grins from ear to ear. “You like us!”

          “God, please don’t say it out loud,” Therissa begs. But Brody has already thrown herself at Therissa and hugs her tightly. The teen pretends to be disgusted and protests the physical contact with a few halfhearted complaints, but still returns the hug, patting Brody’s back a few times. “Don’t get sappy about it, though. Ever.”

          Violet watches, standing there awkwardly. She feels a little left out but tries not to show it.

          “Nice pajamas, Twinkle Toes. You look ridiculous,” says Therissa, smirking, causing Violet to scowl and wrap her arms around herself. The teen laughs lightly at her reaction and holds open her free arm, waving Violet over. “Get in here.”

          Her roommate hesitates for a little too long, so Therissa has to reach out and pull her in. As the teen expects, Violet is a big softie and melts into the hug. Eventually, Brody pulls away, but Violet’s mind seems to have drifted off to another dimension where time has stopped, and she’s still clinging on to Therissa, oblivious, as the teen looks down at her in slight amusement. It doesn’t seem like Violet’s going to let go any time soon. Therissa turns to Brody for her reaction, but the auburn-haired girl doesn’t look surprised at all.

          “Yeah, she really likes hugs,” Brody says, shrugging. She already knows how sweet Violet is underneath her hard exterior, but she gets how it might come as a bit of a shock to someone who isn’t as close to her.

          “No kidding,” says Therissa, starting to comb through Violet’s messy locks with her fingers. Even though they’ve been indoors for a while, the girl’s hair is still pretty damp. Having long hair herself, Therissa is familiar with how long hair can take to dry on its own, especially during the colder months. “All right, all right. I know you love me, but why don’t we take care of this mop on your head before it dries permanent?”

          “And drink the cocoa! It’s probably getting cold,” Brody says, bouncing over to the mugs. She grabs one for Violet. “Actually, I think it might be perfect.”

          Therissa tells Violet to sit down on Brody’s bed while she rummages through one of her drawers for a hairbrush and her hair dryer. “Brody, wanna be on brush duty?”

          Handing the mug to Violet, Brody hurries over to Therissa, nearly squealing in excitement. “Yeah!”

          “Go wild.”

          The three girls sit together on the bed, Brody separating Violet’s hair into sections and brushing out the tangles as gently as she can, and Therissa following with the hair dryer. Violet sits in front, sipping her hot chocolate. The drink, combined with the warm air blowing against her neck and back and, on top of that, getting to spend time with her roommates as a trio for the very first time makes Violet feel nice and warm from the inside out. The way Brody is beaming as she cheerfully chats with her and Therissa tells Violet that she feels the same. As for Therissa, although she doesn’t outwardly show it, she’s secretly enjoying their time together, too. The eldest is content just knowing that Brody and Violet are safe, happy, and, most importantly, getting along again.

          Once Violet’s hair is dry, the girls finish their drinks, and then Brody and Therissa tend to the pile of blankets still on the floor. They drape them over the railing of Violet’s bunk to dry, deciding that Violet can just sleep with Brody for the night. Later in the evening, a member of the kitchen staff comes to the girls’ room with some sandwiches and leftover carrot sticks to tide them over until breakfast. Brody sets the food out on her bed picnic style so the three of them can eat together. After dinner, Therissa and Brody briefly leave Violet so they can hit the showers before curfew, but, once they return, Brody crawls right back into her bed with her friend, DVD player in hand, so they can watch a movie together before it’s time to sleep.  

          “Therissaaa…”

          The teenager has her music player and headphones and is halfway up the ladder to her own bunk when Brody calls her name.

          “Whaaat?” Therissa imitates her roommate’s voice, but in a whinier tone. She pokes her head below to see what Brody wants only to find two pairs of eyes staring up at her.

          “Will you watch a movie with us?” asks Brody.

          Therissa sighs loudly, then climbs back down the ladder. Brody and Violet are looking at her with such hopeful faces that there’s no way she can say no. “Fine, but on one condition. We watch one of mine.”

          Brody pouts. “But all of your movies are scary.”

          “I like scary movies,” says Violet, causing Brody to nudge her in the arm.

          “Take it or leave it.”

          Brody reluctantly agrees, and she and Violet roll over to make room for Therissa. The teen comes back with a handful of movies and drops them in front of her roommates.

          “Sorry, but there’s no way in hell that I’m gonna sit through that lame one about the traveling pants that you’ve watched  _a hundred times_ already.”

          “But that one’s my favorite!”

          “We know,” Therissa and Violet reply in unison. They exchange a look and Therissa winks at her, making Violet smile.

          Although Brody isn’t exactly thrilled that they’re about to watch a movie that will probably give her nightmares, she feels like maybe, just  _maybe_  it won’t be so bad. With her best friend, Violet, to her right and Therissa to her left, Brody feels safe. She hopes that even after tonight, she and Violet can still do things with Therissa, even if it’s only every once in a while. She’s having such a good time hanging out together.

          But the night will be over soon.

          Brody wants to remember this feeling forever.

          Violet and Therissa have decided on a movie and insert the disc. As the opening credits roll, Brody burrows deeper into the covers and snuggles up against her roommates. Despite the eerie music starting to play in the background, Brody can’t help but smile.

          She has so much to write about in her diary tomorrow.


End file.
